I had a few ideas but what I have settled on is Unconditional Positive Regard (UPR).  Yes, I know….any of you that know me well or at least reasonably well are not surprised that I want to talk about something such as this.  And you probably realize that I just can’t help myself….it’s the counselor in me that needs to be fed, lol! 🙂


So, what does unconditional positive regard really mean???


Well, at it’s most basic level it means that you respect that other person as a human being with agency to choose how to respond to their situation.  And that no matter how dangerous or dysfunctional they seem to be, you believe that they are doing their best.’

‘UPR therefore means valuing the person as doing their best to move forward in their lives constructively and respecting the person’s right to self-determination, no matter what they choose to do.’

It does not mean that you need to like the person or approve of what they do. Nor does it mean that you have to simply put up with what they do if you see it as dangerous in some way.’

Stephen Joseph Ph.D.


So why the heck are we talking about UPR anyway, you might be thinking?!?  Well, I guess because it’s so important to me.  And if I think about it,  UPR is really at the core of my being.   It’s part and parcel of how I see the world.  And in turn, how I think and feel about all of YOU! I care about you and I respect you.  I want you to be healthy, and happy, and productive, and feel loved, and at peace with yourself and your world.


Wouldn’t the world be a happier place if more people could show each other unconditional positive regard?!?  I certainly do think so!!