When I visited Mary that week she did some things that I now realize were pretty different. At the time I was just sort of overwhelmed.

Several times she changed right in front of me. She did not totally strip but she changed her top or her jeans and just chatted with me as she did it. She smiled and laughed as if it was nothing. I had a sense that this was not something that she would do with another guy. I don’t know exactly how I knew that but I did. 

I remember thinking to myself how pretty she was and how attractive her breasts were. It was hard not to stare.

And she would always call me sweetie or sweet heart. But not the way a woman calls a man that. It was subtle yet not. She spoke to me like I was a child or a boy – not like a boyfriend or a man. And definitely not like an equal. 

When I first got there Mary was excited and happy to see me but apologized and said she had to go see some guy. She was going out on a date after I had traveled there to see her. A clear example of how things were between us.

Other guys would have objected or gotten angry…but I just went with it. I would have been afraid to object, or not known how. It was not in me, not with her.

And then there were the conversations about her dates and boyfriends. Mary told me the ones she liked and the ones she didn’t. She would even tell me how “endowed” they were.

I remember being totally tongue tied as I knew that I was a bit “under endowed.” Once during this visit she even demonstrated how big this one guy was. Mary showed me with her hands, making an “Oh, my God” sort of expression!

After seeing this there was no way that I would voluntarily take down my pants for her. Mary made it pretty clear what impressed her and I knew that it was not me. She was looking for someone more manly. I was just “company” for her, not boyfriend material. I did not even think of questioning it.

Joy & Love,

Goddess Mandy 🙂 XO

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